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#EstherPerel: Relationship insights, modern love, therapy wisdom, complex dynamics, infidelity discussions, passionate advice, vulnerable conversations, compelling content, relationship goals, insightful perspectives, couples therapy.
#couples #BestFriends #affair #Relationship #tellthebeees #loveisblind #estherperel should your partner be your best friend? ##friendship##loneliness
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#couples #BestFriends #affair #Relationship #tellthebeees #loveisblind #estherperel should your partner be your best friend? ##friendship##loneliness
YouTube.com/@oprah #estherperel #oprah
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YouTube.com/@oprah #estherperel #oprah
Valentine’s Day according to Esther Perel & Oprah! #estherperel #oprah #vday
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Valentine’s Day according to Esther Perel & Oprah! #estherperel #oprah #vday
Most couples think their arguments spiral out of control because of WHAT they’re fighting about. But research from Drs. John & Julie Gottman found that the first three minutes of an argument predict the outcome 96% of the time. In other words—how you start the conversation determines where it will go. If you open with criticism, blame, or a harsh tone, your partner’s nervous system registers a threat. They shut down, get defensive, or escalate the conflict—not because they don’t care, but because their brain is in self-protection mode. But here’s what most people don’t realize: 💡 In arguments, we aren’t just reacting to the present. We’re reacting to the past. ➡️ Your partner’s dismissive tone might unconsciously remind you of how unheard you felt as a child. ➡️ Their withdrawal might trigger the deep loneliness of emotional neglect. ➡️ Their frustration might echo the unpredictable anger of a parent. But if you change the way you start, the entire conversation shifts. Instead of blame, lead with a softened approach: ❌ “You never listen to me.” ✅ “I know we both have a lot going on, but I really need to feel heard right now. Is now a good time to talk?” ❌ “You don’t care about me.” ✅ “I know that’s not your intention, but when this happens, I feel disconnected from you.” ❌ Shutting down completely. ✅ “This is hard for me to talk about, but I really want us to work through it together.” If you’re stuck in repetitive arguments and want to change the way you communicate in conflict, this is exactly what we work on inside my next live virtual cohort on emotional regulation. Comment “WAITLIST” to be notified when registration opens! #EmotionalIntelligence #ConflictResolution #RelationshipSkills #EmotionalRegulation #GottmanMethod #GaborMate #EstherPerel #CommunicationSkills #RelationshipCoach #AttachmentTheory
2.3k
Most couples think their arguments spiral out of control because of WHAT they’re fighting about. But research from Drs. John & Julie Gottman found that the first three minutes of an argument predict the outcome 96% of the time. In other words—how you start the conversation determines where it will go. If you open with criticism, blame, or a harsh tone, your partner’s nervous system registers a threat. They shut down, get defensive, or escalate the conflict—not because they don’t care, but because their brain is in self-protection mode. But here’s what most people don’t realize: 💡 In arguments, we aren’t just reacting to the present. We’re reacting to the past. ➡️ Your partner’s dismissive tone might unconsciously remind you of how unheard you felt as a child. ➡️ Their withdrawal might trigger the deep loneliness of emotional neglect. ➡️ Their frustration might echo the unpredictable anger of a parent. But if you change the way you start, the entire conversation shifts. Instead of blame, lead with a softened approach: ❌ “You never listen to me.” ✅ “I know we both have a lot going on, but I really need to feel heard right now. Is now a good time to talk?” ❌ “You don’t care about me.” ✅ “I know that’s not your intention, but when this happens, I feel disconnected from you.” ❌ Shutting down completely. ✅ “This is hard for me to talk about, but I really want us to work through it together.” If you’re stuck in repetitive arguments and want to change the way you communicate in conflict, this is exactly what we work on inside my next live virtual cohort on emotional regulation. Comment “WAITLIST” to be notified when registration opens! #EmotionalIntelligence #ConflictResolution #RelationshipSkills #EmotionalRegulation #GottmanMethod #GaborMate #EstherPerel #CommunicationSkills #RelationshipCoach #AttachmentTheory

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