No, I am NOT ok. This has been a whirlwind of mental fuckery that was not on my bingo card to end this year and start off the next. We have so many unknowns that we won't have answers for until after my surgery on 1/23. Has it metastisized? What kind of cancer is it? What stage is it? Will I need chemo? Will I need radiation? When will I have the BSO surgery to remove my ovaries and fallopian tubes to remove the risk for ovarian cancer that BRCA1 causes? How will my kids handle all of this? Will my youngest (7 with AuDHD) remember to be gentle? Will he lash out? My head is swirling non stop, I literally mean NON STOP. I'm a planner, I want to have these answers so I can plan and try to think ahead, but I can't. I'm stuck in the suck of waiting and worrying. What I do know, I have an army of amazing humans behind me cheering me on and lifting me up every single day. The outpouring of love, support, well wishes, prayers & donations has all been humbling and has helped me keep my head on straight. The donations have helped my husband realize he can take the 2nd week off unpaid to help me during recovery and we will be ok. That peace of mind alone so far has been so amazing. He works so damn hard for us, to be able to say "it's ok, we will be ok" is something I can't thank you all enough for. We have so much to worry about right now, knowing our kids will be fed and he can be by my side for this recovery is literally everything I can ask for. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you. 🩷 My page and content may look different for a while. I intend to share this journey as much as I can. I'll have links in my bio for more info as well. If I help just one person, my heart is over joyed. PLEASE don't take screenings, family histories, genetic mutations lightly. Get in and get it done. If I'm "lucky" enough to have caught it really early, it will be because I didn't just sit on this info. I moved fast & took it seriously. You are worth it, get your butt into the doctor! With this surgery please know my cups & molds will be closed down. Anything ready to ship will remain on the site, but no customs or work will be done for the forseeable future. I don't know what my recovery will look like so I just don't know for how long. I intend to keep the shirts still going, the shirt I'm wearing in my last pic is on my site, we will still run pre orders like we have been because my amazing husband will help. It will help me feel like I'm still contributing while I'm not able to do all the things I want. If you ever have questions about any of it please email me, it's the easiest way, all links for all the things are in my bio.
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