We always have an option of how we handle a situation. On this day, one of my students was clearly dysregulated. I was working with some pretty big behaviors all day. Leaving the area, refusing to do work, noise making, name calling- you name it. Behaviors that I know to be associated with a stress response. I worked with him, sought support for him, but my goodness it was testing my patience at times. After all, I had a classroom full of other kids with needs and a curriculum to stay on track with. At that point, I was channeling all of my inner calm and I had to focus on behavior management strategies- which included getting to the root of the behavior. Thankfully, he gave us a heads up about some things that were going on with him and at home, and I knew he just needed me to stand by as support whenever he started spiraling. At the end of the day, he took two boxes of crayons and smashed them on the table. Literally 4 minutes before we walked out of the door. He cried and cried and cried. I hugged him and told him that tomorrow would be a better day, but we have to find other ways to communicate and ask for help. I could’ve let myself lose my cool. I could’ve sent him to the office. I could’ve written him up. I could’ve punished him. But because he COMMUNICATED his struggles with me, I knew he was suffering enough. I gathered the crayons into a neat pile, and wrote him note, reminding him that it’s okay to have bad days. It’s okay to not be okay sometimes. But just like those scattered crayons, he had the opportunity to put himself together on HIS time, and he knew he would be supported as he did. The note read “I’m sorry you had such a hard day today. It’s okay to not be okay. You are loved, supported, and cared for here. I know you’ll work on putting these crayons back together when you’re ready. I’m looking forward to a hug if you need one.” When he walked in the next day, he looked at the crayon pile, read the note, and slowly began putting the crayons away. When he finished he gave me a hug and simply said, “Thank you for not sending me to the office. I’m sorry about the crayons.” That afternoon, I overheard his sister complaining about getting in trouble that day, to to which he replied, “It’s okay to make mistakes. You just have to promise to do better tomorrow.” When there is communication, there is connection. Cards can be found at shopsmackpacks.com use code ARENSBERG for a discount.
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